One man's trash, not necessarily another man's treasure

I've always had a hard time throwing anything away of value, or what I perceive to have value.  I am an expert trash-thrower-awayer and almost obsessively go through my kitchen to make sure there aren't any packages or papers laying around, but when it comes to an iffy item, I am guilty of letting things lay around and get in my way.   A good example would be a pair of Carters brand toddler jeans.  The zipper was broken, but the rest of the jeans looked new.  

I don't know how to fix such a small zipper.  I do not have the time or patience to learn.   So what do I do with them?  I let them sit with good intentions.  By that I mean I have this idea in my mind that I'll either decide I all of a sudden have the energy and know how to fix the jeans, or that I will donate them so another kid can use them.   

Those thoughts are insanely unrealistic.  I've fixed maybe 2 articles of clothing in my life and how cruel would I be if I gave a pair of jeans with a non-working zipper to a needy child?  What, is THEIR mother going to want to fix them?  Even if that person exists, where will I find them?  When will I find them?  Will I even remember to be looking for this needy little boy who just happens to be the same size as this pair of jeans and has a handy mom when it comes to zippers?   And hell, it may be a nice gesture if this person exists to go buy them a nice new outfit, something that would last.

So I throw those suckers in the trash can.  Painful, but empowering.  I had to really talk myself through that one.

It really just comes down to caring for people and myself.   My time and energy is too valuable to be spent on those jeans and its terrible to keep a pair of unusable children's jeans in circulation.   Same for an adult piece of clothing with a small hole or imperfection.    It just isn't right to pass that on. 

The just-chuck-it method can be applied to anything that probably won't make it into the hands of someone who needs it.  A good rule is if it gets lost under the cardboard flaps in the box in which you're putting your donations in, its probably not worth donating..unless of course its a diamond ring.   It's important to think about the person who will going through your donations.   If I wouldn't want to dig out a single butter knife or an old pair of panties from a box, they probably don't either.    

Sometimes making the call is a little harder.   Say..a single  completely fine, usable Christmas ornament that you find in May and want to get rid of.   Just remember that your time is more valuable than items and decide with that in mind.  If you can get that one ornament safely to a thrift store and you think they'll put it away until November/December when they can sell it...go for it. 

Keep in mind also that your good intentions that are never acted on don't make you a kinder, more generous, giving person.  You're still just a person with a dirty house, dusting around items that will never be used.

A new life

On September 19th at 2:24pm I gave birth to my third child. He was 8 lbs.11 oz. Bigger than my first, smaller than my second. His name is Finnegan. The last couple months of the pregnancy were hard physically and emotionally, so I wasn't good about blogging. However, I was good about continuing the decluttering process.

I am absolutely thrilled to be able to say that I accomplished decluttering my entire home. During the process I got rid of 40+ garbage bags full of items. I'm not talking about trash either! Of course I am always having to watch what comes in my home (a couple Burger King toys have made their way into the boys' room, dammit!). I am (re)going through my kitchen currently. Not a whole lot is going except food items, which makes the initial decluttering feel as though it was a success.

Life has changed dramatically. The thought of adding another child to my family felt overwhelming, but with the decluttering done my life is actually easier now than it was about 6 months ago when I started this process. I can sit and relax now, something I was unable to do before. I can clean rooms in 10 minutes, whereas before it would take me a couple hours. My kids play with their few toys a lot more now and aren't bored nearly as much. They were overwhelmed before, just as I was.

I have been able to focus on projects like cleaning windows or decorating rooms I didn't have time for before.

I can do my dishes in 5 minutes. FIVE MINUTES.

I plan to write more about the process soon, but am giving myself some time to enjoy my new baby and make sure I give my other 2 kiddos the special attention they need during this time too.